Scalpel's Edge

A surgeon's notes

Take it as read….

I have blogged before about my guilt, questioning my life choices.  Is is right to be working away from my kids? Am I a terrible wife to (effectively) make my husband a single parent? How long is it since I last spoke to my Mum? 

A friend caught me at this in real life recently and told me to get over it.  Talking about your guilt just emphasises the bad bits in your life.  That helped me.  I have tried to get over it a bit.  So I’m trying not to overshare anymore.

Just take it as read:

I love my kids and wish I could spend more time with them

I remind myself that I choose my life, and own all the decisions I have made

I miss my husband, too.  I reckon I must one day take him to a really fancy restaurant to make up for not being there.

I love my job.  It sets my heart on fire to see patients get better, go home and never see them again.  I could not give it up.

My life at this moment is the best I have ever had it.  I think fondly of the past, but I wouldn’t want to be there.  I look forward to the future, but don’t want to give up the now I have with snuggly kids, and the excitement of learning new things each day.

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