I have been MIA for a while, but I still find tweeple funny. Here are some of the ticklers for the last few weeks.
Apparently giving a running commentary of what’s happening on tv while your wife cleans up isn’t considered helping. Who makes these rules?
ZOMG! President Obama wants to provide healthcare for ALL citizens he’s destroying America! *rolls eyes*
I shouldn’t be allowed to shop for Lego after 10pm. My amazon cart is ridiculous right now
Playing pretend shit with the girl. I’m nit sure but I think I just ordered hot pineapple ice cream.
Just worked out I can change apple tv music from the bath- this is quite a breakthrough in bathing experience
Just discoveredpics on husband’s phone of me laying naked in sun yesterday!!!!! DELETE DELETE DELETE EWWWWWWWWWE
4 yr old: “why do you have this on the TV if you are looking at your iPhone”. #insiders
Thinking it’s not plagiarists that are responsible for global warming but PhD Students & Academics. I have just filed half the Amazon.
“Where the Wild Things Are” w/ a bunch of 6 year olds. Saturday nights sure aren’t what they used to be
Dear people next door, shut up. I’m trying to tweet. Although some more snooze time would be better.
“Yes, he was the token gay alcoholic non-native valet” #bookclubquotes